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Circle of Influence
Managing your lifestyle is really important in the aggregation of marginal gains. If we want to improve by 1% every day, we have to set up our lives to support that 1% gain. In the past, we’ve posted articles about things we control in our day, like diet, sleep, and exercise. Once we have our lifestyle under some structure and control, we have to reset our focus on outside influences. Or, as we like to refer to it, your circle of influence.
The concept of your circle of influence is based on a Jim Rohn’s concept that you are the sum of the 5 people you spend the most time with. Jim Rohn was an entrepreneur, businessman, and motivational speaker. He believed that while you are shaped by many life experiences, it is your five primary social interactions that frame you. Moreover, this makes sense. If your best friend has a good or bad habit, you are more likely to start that habit as well. It is simply exposure. More recent studies has shown that your primary influences include more than these five people. However, the concept stays generally the same. You are shaped by the primary people in your life.
Preferred Qualities
When we are trying to develop as a human being. When we have a purpose, and we are striving to live for that purpose on a daily basis, the people who influence us become very important. Thus, we need these people to exhibit certain qualities. Not everyone in your life needs to exhibit every one of these qualities. However, they should have at least one.
- Your primary influencers should be thought provoking and ask you the tough questions. In other words, people in your life should be challenging you.
- Your primary influencers should hold a high opinion of you and help you increase and maintain a confident opinion of yourself.
- Your primary influencers should be people who act as a mentor, and unbiased critic of your life. Alternatively, they may provide you with someone to mentor.
- Your primary influencers should provide accountability for you to always become a better version of yourself.
- The primary people in your life should be positive influences or constructive criticizers.
What To Do Now
When talking about the primary people in your life, we are not talking about the people you work with, or maybe even family. We are talking about the people you consciously choose to spend time with. These may be friend, business partners, spouses, or coaches.
The best thing you can do is take some time to assess who is in your life. Pull out a piece of paper and write a list of the five people you are around most of the time. Now, sit back and look at that list. Does everyone on the list exhibit one or more of the qualities above? If not, it may be time to make the hard choices in life and take the hard actions. It may be time to remove someone from your circle of influence. Often times, it is easier to add a new influence than it is to simply remove a bad influence.
You are in control of who you choose to spend time with. Don’t take that decision lightly. If you want to set yourself up for the most success you can have in all that you do, those around you are very important.
